Human-Loving Misanthropy

Bologna.

khughes:

jschlosser:

khughes:

“Are introverts arrogant? Hardly. I suppose this common misconception has to do with our being more intelligent, more reflective, more independent, more level-headed, more refined, and more sensitive than extroverts.” - jonathan rauch

I, as an extrovert, would like to disagree… i am intelligent, reflective, very independent, and level-headed…maybe not the most sensitive, but come on, jonathan. thats bull. I agreed with a lot of what he had to say about introverts not understanding extroverts, but this statement made me disregard the rest of his article. That’s too bad. All, well most, of my friends are introverts, and although Steve says its because I force them to be friends with me, then so be it. Maybe I am trying to care for you unlike what this silly article implies. The end.

Thanks, Steve and Lauren. haha.

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200303/rauch

Kelley, I think that’s a joke. Because he says they are not arrogant, then he says all those things, which are arrogant.

Ironically, since you missed the joke, he accidently proves his point about introverts being more intelligent than you ;)

Jon, shush up and go write me a paper. haha. Kidding.

Ps. I wasn’t seriously pissed about that article, just putting in my two cents.

Wow, I read that and thought it was hilarious.  Obviously Kelley is a part of the extrovert crowd… ha ha ha ha ha.

Something I Thought of

“Advising Resource Center, this is Hank, how can I help you.”

“Yes,” she said.  I didn’t ask a question, nor did I say her name being that I didn’t have any Martha Stewart insider-information causing me to break my usual pick-up-the-phone mantra just to say her name thus satiating her thriving delusions of grandeur.

“My son,” she continued, “has just been accepted into Grand Valley”

And here it was.  The part where every employee at Grand Valley State University’s Adivising Resources and Special Programs Office was always ready for when a proud parent was calling about his or her son’s or daughter’s acceptance into this road-map-to-destiny school.  It was the pause.  The pause between “Valley” and “well.”  The pause that says everything about a parent down to the wiggling of the toes and the radiating smile of pride stretching across said parent’s greedy little face.  A pause that expects some sort of cheering; a rip and a roar with “for he’s a jolly good fellow” echoing in the background.  The pause is the sensation somebody gets when life always does turn out like the movies.  The pause is the feeling that one can actually stop time.

What Happens in Twilight

Bella is short for Isablla and she wears flour on her face to make herself look like she has never been to Florida before.  She also wears lip stick.  She moves to a town where it rains a lot, but sometime it is sunny there and when it is, Edward Cullen likes to sparkle like Liberachi.  The conflict with this whole story is that high school sucks.  Bella decides to take a course in Spanish, and finds out that it means beautiful girl, but it also means beautiful in Italian too.  This creates the first conflict because now everyone thinks she is really pretty since that’s what her name means, but she is trying to figure out whether she is Italian or Spanish.

Bella then forgets that she has a cactus and the popular kids take it from her and put it on her seat.  Luckily she notices it because it’s large.  But it turns out that the students don’t even know what a cactus is because they are werefiends and they enjoy eating meat, but most of them are vegetarians because they made a pact with God that says that they aren’t allowed to eat anything with meat in it.  So they eat brussel sprouts.  These werefiends don’t really come into the play until the surprise ending where Bella finds herself getting ina  fight with the popular kid and he is a werefiend who broke the pact with God and kills Bella’s best friend Michelle.  But Bella is all right with hat because Michelle was the most popular and Bella was runner up.  So the surprise is that Bella is now the popular girl because of Edward Cullen’s ability to glow and she dates him.

Mammy...

Her mammy died in the garage that day.  She climbed up on that car to get the draw-string and fell on her neck.  Who knows how long it took until somebody found her.  Some say four hours, but only that dead brain of hers actually knows how long she was writhing and gasping for air before the cat actually got ahold of her. 
The death of his wife killed the girl’s father.  He had two kids and two dogs; a house and a job he was about to lose without even knowing it.  Her daddy was the one who found her and let the paramedics deal with her.  His son, Beau, hadn’t come home yet since his mammy couldn’t pick him up from latchkey and the girl the only living one in the house- but a one year old can’t answer the phone.  Her daddy rescued her from being locked in her room and she watched the pretty lights swirl like fireworks outside the window. 
Beau!  Her daddy said.
Her daddy buckled her into her safety seat and they drove to pick up Beau.
They arrived at the elementary school where Mrs. Tompkins and Beau were waiting outside in front of the entrance.
Daniel, I have been trying to get ahold of you and Angela.
Her father took Beau’s hand and they walked back to the car where she was waiting.
Aren’t you going to thank me, Daniel?
Her daddy didn’t respond.

Her daddy drove the car back into the driveway, opened the front seat to let Beau out and opened the back door to unbuckle the girl.  He picked her up and carried her inside as Beau immediately started playing games.
Her daddy put her in her in front of her doll house to play with her toys.  He left her room and she sat there for some time just looking around the room.  She quickly turned her head to the door and gave it a look of credulity.  She picked herself up and baby-stumbled to the door.  She fell once through the hallway and twice in the living room until she finally came to her mammy and daddy’s room.
Mammy, she would say.
Mammy…
Mammy……..
Her father would hear her and hide in the same spot his wife had died and begin to cry.  The tears hit the floor and mixed in with the drool that gagged his wife because of her inability to swallow. 
It was her brother Beau who found his daddy crying in the garage.  He just stood there watching him with a placid face and his head cocked to the side.  It was as if her brother didn’t know any emotion. 
Daddy…
Her daddy quickly wiped his tears and sniffled the snot back into his nose.  His trembling hand swept across his face.  He didn’t want his son to see him crying.  Hey buddy, he said.
Daddy, Alice keeps calling for mammy.
I know, Beau.
Daddy, where is mammy?
We’ll see if she comes back tomorrow, all right?
Daddy, why didn’t she pick us me up from school?
Beau! She’ll be back tomorrow! He yelled as he wailed and tears began to stream down his eyes harder than before.
Beau just stood and watched again until he sauntered away.  He saw Alice in the kitchen calling for her mammy and became angry.  His hand drew back and released with an open palm against her chest.  She went crashing to the floor and began to cry as vehemently as her father.
She looked up at her brother and, if she could talk, asked, why have you done this to me.
Beau ran away when he heard his father coming.
She saw her daddy come to her.  She was still crying and when her daddy looked at the back of her head he saw that it was bleeding after it hit the leg of a chair.
He quickly kissed the top of her head and got up.
I’ll come riht back, darling.  I’ll be right back.
She continued to cry while her daddy stomped through the living room- through the hallway- ripped open Beau’s door and grabbed hold of him by the shoulders.
Kneeling down he looked into his son’s eyes and looked at the cowardice in them as they juxtaposed the engine driving her daddy’s eyes. 
Did you do that to her!?
No daddy-
He put his hand over his sons mouth.  Don’t lie to me!  When I take my hand off your mouth you are going to answer me the right way.
He took his hand off of Beau’s mouth and Beau was slow to answer.
Well…?
Her daddy saw her brother begin to form an ‘N’ and he threw him against the bed, walked to the door, grabbed the handle and slammed it.
How long do I have to stay in here, he brother asked.
Daddy…
Daddy…?
He began to walk out of his room when her daddy ran with the girl in his hands and slammed the door back on his son with tears dragging down his palid face.  He slipped down with his back against the door as Alice climbed out of her daddy’s grasp and began to walk to her parent’s room.
Mammy……….